WW: Change

"All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we enter another." -Anatole France

I wouldn't call myself scared of change really; however I've always been oddly aware of it.

When I turned 10, I remember writing in my diary about how old I was getting, I mean nine to ten was entering double digits y'all... how EPIC. When I left my job in New York City I stayed late into the night just sitting in my dark office, looking out onto Midtown Manhattan, watching the people milling about and taking it in, knowing that this was the close to a remarkable adventure that I'd one day tell my kids about.  And now, here I am, a hot mess over weaning my baby, my toddler, from the bottle.

"When we are no longer able to change a situation- we are challenged to change ourselves." -Viktor E. Frankl

I'm heartbroken. To those that don't know, there's a protocol: 12-months - that's when you're supposed to get rid of the bottle. But can I tell you my two favorite times of the day? When Coop first wakes up and we snuggle on the couch while he drinks his morning bottle, and at night before he goes to bed, when we snuggle in his room while he drinks his nighttime bottle. Giving up the bottle means giving up the sweetest moments of my day; how could I want that?

“You can't stop the future
You can't rewind the past
The only way to learn the secret
...is to press play.”

I'm sad to see this time with Coop go. This is one more way he will be less dependent on me, and it feels like I'm just giving away this time when I could be purposefully delaying it. (I mean, who would it really hurt if he had his morning bottle into his teenage years)?

"If we don't change we don't grow. If we don't grow, we aren't really living." -Gail Sheehy

I know what you're thinking: this girl is depressed over a bottle? And it's okay. For you it may be a relationship, a move to a new city, new job, who knows - there is always an emotional attachment to something that meant something to us, no matter how big or small. The new thing-to-come around the corner is likely just as sweet.

And you may be wondering how this process is going?

[caption id="attachment_1437" align="aligncenter" width="490"] Clearly having a tough time.[/caption]

"If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." - Wayne Dyer

Well it turns out I am the one who has become dependent on the bottle, not him. I mean, I'm kinda embarrassed. We quit cold turkey and had no problems. Not-a-one. It turns out it's not the act of change that is the hard part, it's the anticipation of it.

Cheers y'all....Lauren